Department of Homeland Romances

Department of Homeland Romances

by | Mar 9, 2010 | Uncategorized

Operators are standing by! Call now and hire us…before your he does!

↓ Transcript
SMILING WOMAN: Are you looking for a romance that's secure, patriotic and 100-percent American? Then you need...

The Department of Homeland Romances!

The only dating service that offers...

--Extensive background checks...going back to birth! And beyond!
--Electronic surveillance...to find out if he's right for you!
--Misinformation! Don't bother lying to impress him! We'll do it for you!
--Torture! We'll fine out how he really feels about you...plus what makes him cry like a little girl!

We guarantee if you're not satisfied...there's something wrong with you!

It’s Not Just Sex…

It’s Not Just Sex…

by | Feb 21, 2010 | Uncategorized

I hate it when you forget whom you’re sleeping with. It makes thank you notes so difficult!

↓ Transcript
Young man is smiling at a young woman in a party dress. She coming down the stairs towards him.

HIM: It’s not just sex! I really love you, Mary!

HER: My name’s Marsha! But close enough!

I Like People, But…

I Like People, But…

by | Feb 18, 2010 | Uncategorized

Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.

↓ Transcript
WOMAN TO MAN: Sure, I like people! It's just men that I find disgusting!

Half-Price Love!

Half-Price Love!

by | Feb 9, 2010 | Uncategorized

So maybe he can afford to date her–for now. But what happens if things get serious? Even at half price, could he afford the honeymoon?

Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Man holds crying woman.

MAN: Sorry, but I'm dumping you for my therapist! She's blonde, beautiful and best of all...she's only charging me half price for tonight's date!

WOMAN: You fool! Now you'll never get out of therapy!

The Naked Truth

The Naked Truth

by | Jan 3, 2010 | Uncategorized

Nude? The ultimate in full disclosure first dates!

Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.

↓ Transcript
SCENE: Two young women. One is in her underwear, arranging her hair as she looks in a mirror. The other is behind her and looking on.

WOMAN IN UNDERWEAR: First dates are so difficult! I never know what to wear!

SECOND WOMAN: Oh, I know! It’s enough to make you want to give up clothes completely!

Secret Link