by John | Nov 22, 2009 | Uncategorized
I can’t take full credit (or blame) for today’s comic. The heavy boobs gag was suggested by my wife (Shelagh.) I noodled with the wording a bit and added the line from the helpful guy in the background, but the basic, uh…thrust of the gag is all hers.
Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.
↓ TranscriptSCENE: Woman with her eyes closed and her head and arms resting on a desk. A man walks through a doorway in the background.
WOMAN: Gravity attack! My boobs are...so heavy! Need help…fast!
MAN (singing): Here I come to save the day!
by John | Nov 10, 2009 | Uncategorized
Are you too beautiful for your own good? Yeah, me too.
Sprechen Sie Deutsch? To read this comic in German click here.
↓ TranscriptSCENE: Young woman notices that other women are staring at her.
WOMAN: Everyone’s staring! I’m either more beautiful than I thought…or I slept with someone’s boyfriend again!
by John | Oct 27, 2009 | Uncategorized
Ladies, as the official spokesman for all men, I can assure you that today’s comic is…oh, hell. It’s true. But don’t feel that you actually have to cook for us.
I mean, it’s not like we’re going to actually die of starvation. We can follow recipes (if there are pictures); toast bread without burning down the house (sometimes); and we can learn to whip eggs into submission. (Bad eggs!)
In short, we’re as smart as you. We’re just lazier and better at ordering takeout!
↓ TranscriptWOMAN FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Wild passion and cheap thrills are never enough! Sooner or later men Expect you to...cook for them!
by John | Oct 20, 2009 | Uncategorized
Last Kiss Character Bio — Anna Rexia was born in Last Kiss, USA on April 1, 1990 and she officially weighed 6 lbs 9 ounces. However…
“It’s not true!” sniffed Ms. Rexia. “If only I could go back in time. I could prove that I only weighed 6 lbs 2 ounces!
“The nurse who weighed me was obviously jealous because I was so much cuter and slimmer than her. She had fat, horrible 7-ounce thumbs and I’m sure she snuck one of them onto the scale.
“I’ve always been careful about my weight. At one point, I actually weighed less than nothing. Of course, my parents worried. A strong gust of wind–or rampaging squirrels–could easily carry me off.
“So, every weekend when we went camping, they’d tie me to a big boulder to keep me safe. Sometimes I’d be safe for days. But then I’d get loose and find my way back home.”
Sprechen Sie Deutsch? Read this comic in German.
↓ TranscriptSCENE: Beautiful woman crying on a couch.
WOMAN: How could I give in to my desires like that?
WOMAN (again): I’m showing already!
WOMAN (again): I feel like barfing!
INSET CAPTION: The day a supermodel gained a pound!
by John | Sep 16, 2009 | Uncategorized
Family pride is a beautiful thing!
Also funny (maybe funnier) in German.
↓ TranscriptSCENE: A young woman smiles as she talks to her dad.
WOMAN: Good news, Dad! I broke mom’s record! I’ve been
in college a full week! And I’m still not pregnant!
