by John | Mar 16, 2009 | Uncategorized
Why I’m celebrating St. Patrick’s Day this year–with extra gusto:
Twenty-five years ago on St. Patrick’s Day, my wife went insane. Instead of screaming and running out of the church, she married me. So St. Pat’s Day is always a major event in our home. This year we’re celebrating a quarter century of Shelagh having a lapse in judgment and somehow being happily married to me. So far, so good
↓ TranscriptCAPTION: Breakfast Cereal Theater presents: Leprechaun Love -- a tale of sugar-coated romance!
WOMAN (EMBRACING MAN): You’re always after me lucky charms!
MAN (EMBRACING WOMAN): they’re magically delicious!
by John | Mar 13, 2009 | Uncategorized
I’ve been looking for an excuse to use this comic for a long time and here it is. Lucky Friday the 13th. Let’s chase the gloom away with a disaster comic. If you can laugh about the economy, it’s not that bad, right? Sure…
↓ TranscriptCAPTION: If the economy was a plane flight…
PILOT ON INTERCOM: …you may experience mild turbulence!
STEWARDESS: …Free barf bags for everyone!
PASSENGER: Is it too late to call my broker?
by John | Mar 10, 2009 | Uncategorized
Grr. I still haven’t seen the movie yet. I’ve been short on time and dealing with a neck/back problem that’s going to make sitting in a theater for a three-hour movie a test of endurance. So what’s the verdict, folks? Is the movie a masterpiece worth seeing? Or a pain in the neck?
↓ TranscriptCAPTION #1: Who watches the Watchmen? People like you!
PANEL 1
CAPTION #2: People who know how to prioritize!
MAN SEATED IN MOVIE THEATER: oh no! My doctor just texted me! my lab results show I…
WOMAN SEATED BESIDE HIM WATCHING MOVIE: Shh! I can’t hear...the explosions and screams for mercy!
PANEL 2
CAPTION 3: People who know enough…is never enough!
MAN: We’ve watched it 12 times! Can we go home now...and pretend our marriage still has a chance?
WOMAN: Thirteen’s my lucky number!
by John | Mar 8, 2009 | Uncategorized
This is the first of two comics about going to see THE WATCHMEN. I have to admit that I haven’t actually seen the movie myself. But I almost feel like I have. Everybody seems to be talking about it. Reviews are mixed–from disappointing to outstanding. Oddly enough, the biggest complaint about it seems to be that it sticks “too closely” to the graphic novel and doesn’t bring anything new (besides sound, action and special effects) to the story. We’ll see…
↓ TranscriptCAPTION #1: Who watches the Watchmen? People like you!
PANEL 1
CAPTION #2: Smart people!
MAN BUYING MOVIE TICKET AT BOOTH: Sure, sweetie! I qualify for a student discount! I’m getting a B.A. in B.S. at Befuddled U!
PANEL 2
CAPTION #3: People who plan ahead for a long, long movie!
WOMAN TO DATE: I’m getting in line for the Ladies Room now! By the time I get in…I may actually need to go!
by John | Mar 6, 2009 | Uncategorized
I should point out that THE LEAGUE OF BALDING, MIDDLE-AGED GUYS IN SKIN-TIGHT SUITS would make a swell movie. I’m waiting for offers from Hollywood right now. Still waiting.
↓ TranscriptCAPTION (voice over by woman--main character): “My hubby bought me Marvey Comics as a wedding present! At last I could have my revenge! I immediately announced that we were publishing a new comic book: The League of Balding, Middle-Aged Guys in Skin-Tight Suits!"
WOMAN: Congrats, gentlemen! You’re our new booth bunnies! Your costumes are in the shoebox on my desk!
MAN: Oh, boy! dibs on the purple thong!
