by John | Mar 16, 2010 | Uncategorized
See the world. Date the Navy!
↓ TranscriptSCENE: Woman kisses a sailor as another couple looks on.
WOMAN KISSING SAILOR: At last...my collection is complete! I have a sailor in every port!
by John | Mar 14, 2010 | Uncategorized
I’m not lying. I’m just exploring an alternative reality…
↓ TranscriptSCENE: Man and woman talking.
MAN: I’ve stopped sleeping with my ex-wife! And I’m almost cured of my need to always lie!
WOMAN: At last...we can get married!
by John | Mar 11, 2010 | Uncategorized
Brought to you by Virgin Bright–the only tooth paste that makes your teeth and your reputation shine!
↓ TranscriptSCENE: A woman brushes her teeth.
WOMAN: Gosh! I feel so clean and minty fresh! It's like regaining my virginity...between meals!
by John | Mar 9, 2010 | Uncategorized
Operators are standing by! Call now and hire us…before your he does!
↓ TranscriptSMILING WOMAN: Are you looking for a romance that's secure, patriotic and 100-percent American? Then you need...
The Department of Homeland Romances!
The only dating service that offers...
--Extensive background checks...going back to birth! And beyond!
--Electronic surveillance...to find out if he's right for you!
--Misinformation! Don't bother lying to impress him! We'll do it for you!
--Torture! We'll fine out how he really feels about you...plus what makes him cry like a little girl!
We guarantee if you're not satisfied...there's something wrong with you!
by John | Mar 7, 2010 | Uncategorized
And then I’ll pretend I believe you…
↓ TranscriptSCENE: Woman looks up at man just before they kiss.
WOMAN: Just kiss me, you big phony! And this time…pretend you mean it!
