by John | Jun 27, 2010 | Uncategorized
Dear Future Celebrities:
Good news. You can become famous quickly and ridiculously easy. Here’s how:
Just do something outrageous. Do it in public. Throw in a bit of stupidity and sex (or violence) and — bingo. Instant fame. Enjoy it…while it lasts!
Or you can do something worthwhile. If you get famous for that then great! If not, well…at least you won’t be a total jerk!
↓ TranscriptSCENE: Man and woman talking to a young woman.
MAN: As actors we can’t get arrested! But as bank robbers we’ll
become reality TV stars...
WOMAN: If we don't get shot first!
by John | Jun 24, 2010 | Uncategorized
So much to read–so many ways to not have time to read it!
(But, sure! I would love an iPad.)
↓ TranscriptSCENE: Man and woman smile at each other. Books in the background.
MAN: I’ve gone digital! Now I can carry around all the books I’ll never read!
by John | Jun 22, 2010 | Uncategorized
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but…
–words will never hurt me. However, I’ll still sue for libel!
–oh, crap! The pain! Make it stop!
–I carry a gun! So back off, punk!
–my words are sharp and you’re a pincushion…waiting to get stuck!
–but a little, light bondage might be fun!
↓ TranscriptWOMAN: Sticks and stones MAY break your bones, but…Holy
crud! Medical bills really hurt you!
by John | Jun 20, 2010 | Uncategorized
Rhyme that didn’t quite make the cut for this comic:
“By the pound, I’ve overpaid! My kisses deserve a better grade…of prime rib — USDA!”
Completely Different, Early Draft of This Comic:
↓ TranscriptSCENE: A woman inspecting a cut of meat in her kitchen.
WOMAN (thinking): A butcher’s love is red and juicy!
WOMAN (thinking again): But I’m such a silly goosy...
WOMAN (thinking again): Settling for a man of meat..
WOMAN (thinking again): Whose beef is such a tiny treat!
by John | Jun 17, 2010 | Uncategorized
Play it safe and have a Happy Father’s Day!
↓ TranscriptWOMAN (to man): Honey, you’re going to be a dad!
MAN: Cool! Who’s the mom?
