Spare Change?
MOTHER: It’s your turn to change him, dear!
OFF-SCREEN PARENT: Is not!
MOTHER: Is too!
BABY (thinking): Why call it “change?” It’s always the same!
I don’t know if you found today’s comic funny, but I’m going to pretend that you did. Now I’m pretending that everyone is telling me how funny it is. You’re so kind. Thank you. (It would be rude if I didn’t pretend to be grateful!) No, really. You’re too kind!
Years ago, a gay fan encouraged me to write some gay Last Kiss gags. Since I’m straight, I had to really think about what it meant to be gay. Not the physical stuff. The emotional.
I quickly realized that the whole idea of people choosing to be gay was nonsense. First of all, sexual urges are pretty much hard-wired into people. I didn’t choose to be attracted to women (although I sure encouraged women to be attracted to me.) It was just this overwhelming attraction that blindsided me at puberty.
So for someone to “choose” against those urges–and to buck everything in our society (plus parents) that expected us to team up with the opposite sex–well, that would be incredibly difficult. Therefore, being gay had to be tough. So…it takes a “real man” to be gay. Unless, of course, you’re a “real woman.”