Like the Canadian Mounties, she always get her man.
Art by Vince Colletta Studio from the story “Playing It Cool” in FIRST KISS #12, Jan. 1960.
↓ Transcript
SCENE, PANEL 1: Woman #1 packing a suitcase while Woman #2 watches in background.
WOMAN #1: I’ll make a new start…someplace where my name Isn’t on every bathroom wall!
WOMAN #2: Well, that leaves out the entire U.S.!
PANEL #2:
WOMAN #1: Then I’ll move to Canada! Gosh! M-maybe I could become a Mountie!
WOMAN #2: Well, you’re certainly qualified! Nobody’s been mounted more than you!
1960 Art: Vince Colletta Studio ©2010 & 2019 Last Kiss Inc. Color: Allen Freeman
Art Codes: 12.1.8.3 & 12.1.4.1
WOMAN #1: I’ll make a new start…someplace where my name Isn’t on every bathroom wall!
WOMAN #2: Well, that leaves out the entire U.S.!
PANEL #2:
WOMAN #1: Then I’ll move to Canada! Gosh! M-maybe I could become a Mountie!
WOMAN #2: Well, you’re certainly qualified! Nobody’s been mounted more than you!
1960 Art: Vince Colletta Studio ©2010 & 2019 Last Kiss Inc. Color: Allen Freeman
Art Codes: 12.1.8.3 & 12.1.4.1
“And don’t call him ‘that character’! He has a name! It’s…uh…Wait a minute…I have it tattooed somewhere on my body…”
___________________________________________________
“You can’t stop me Mom!”
“Well I could. But why would I want to? I’ve been dying to turn this room into a sex dungeon for your father and I. And his friends. See, I was thinking about reinforcing that beam so we could hang harnesses…”
___________________________________________________
“You can’t stop me Mom!”
“Well I could. I have a number of options available to me. Physical violence. Emotional blackmail. I could show you something shiny. I can stop reminding you which doors in the house are ‘pushes’ and which are ‘pulls’. Remember that one time you go trapped in the bathroom? Two days because you couldn’t figure that push/pull thing out. Luckily I buy organic soap, so you had something to eat. But my point is that you just aren’t very bright. I mean look at the sweater you’re wearing. Honey, that’s the cover we put over the chair downstairs so it doesn’t get dusty. Not a sweater. So. Let’s put away the ‘I’m-gonna-run-away-this-time-for-reals’ suitcase, go downstairs, I’ll make you cocoa, and we’ll talk about why you’re such a failure at everything you do. ‘kay?”
___________________________________________________
“I told you not to date that…that character! I warned you…”
“You can’t stop me Mom…Goofy and I are in love!”
“Love schmove! He’s Disney property Laurie! He’s big time! Look at you! You’re just a big breasted wish fulfillment for girls from the ’50s whose gone public domain! Cross franchise romances never work! It didn’t work for Daphne from Scooby Doo and Woody Woodpecker! It didn’t work for Yosemite Sam and Barney Rubble! And it won’t work for you!”
____________________________________________________________
“You can’t stop me Mom! Unless you’ve hidden my green blouse! And it’s right here…er…in this drawer…uhmmm…Curse you, you hag!”
You’ve outdone yourself, Jam. Truly hilarious!
Thanks. And thanks for the great strip John. This one and all of them. It is truly appreciated. Happy Woman’s Day to you and the women in your life
Many a lovely Daphne out there without a Woody Woodpecker:
https://imgur.com/gallery/NSSAF
Lots of great Velma’s as well:
https://imgur.com/gallery/UfAGeVS
Thanks for not posting images of Yosemite Sam and Barney Rubble.
I haven’t read ALL your Last Kiss comics, though probably more than half. I find a lot of them very funny (so I’m not some humorless harpy).
Maybe I’m just in a bad mood because it’s Friday and I don’t have all my work done, but…
Could I gently suggest you publish the same jokes about men being sexually-active as you do about women? That way it won’t see like you’re perpetuating the stereotype that women are sluts to be shamed while men are simply virile, “sowing their oats” and “boys will be boys.” I think women should have the same chance to be sexual beings without being shamed – NOT that you’re the only cause of that!
Thanks
Oh my God, get a life or at least a sense of humor!!!!
I’m with Guy.
If one were to read the other half of ALL the Last Kiss comics, one would find the ones about women who aren’t slutty but are confident (“Hey stewardess! How about a drink?” “Sure! I’ll have a gin and tonic!”) and much smarter than the Von Tramp male cousins. The very point of “Last Kiss” is to bring a screeching halt to the stereotype of the “First Kiss” romance comic “good girls” of the ’50s and ’60s. No better way to do this than by combining the fabulous retro art with satire — and remember the point of satire is to use humor to make you think about something serious. Some of the gags are punchlines, but some of them are also biting mini-commentaries. I remember some of these comics from my ’60s childhood and find the remakes hilarious. And the gags are usable — such as when our male friends complain about the lack of dateable ladies. I love being able to say, “Maybe you should use your teeth.”
As I said in my original comment, I was having a bad day. I’ve probably read 90% of all of Last Kiss, thanks to the archive. When I wrote this, I was too tired to go back and re-read to see the balance. I have a strong sense of humor, just that one hit me particularly hard with all the slut-shaming that goes on these days.
John, I *greatly* appreciate your thoughtful and considered reply. I know you’re going for humor and to point out human silliness, and I enjoy it tremendously, which is why I follow it.
I see your point about your source material mostly containing women. I wouldn’t want you to change your humor. I was just suggesting a re-balancing of the targets.
So “Laurie” in the original comic could have gone to follow “Bob”, whose name had been written in bathroom stall so much that she had to see if he was really that good. So Bob becomes the “slut” and “Laurie” is just a “researcher of human behavior”, looking for a good time. And “Mom” could say that’s how she met “Laurie’s” dad.
No problem on your original remarks, Guy. I didn’t take offense.
I do like the idea of Bob having his name on bathroom walls (and Laurie’s mom saying that this is how she met Bob.)
If I come up with the proper set up and art, I might do a gag incorporating some of that. I can’t promise anything, though. It’s all a matter of whether inspiration strikes.
Glad you liked my twist on the original joke. I’ll PM you my address where you can send the commission check! 😉
I’ve read through all the comments about today’s Last Kiss several times. I didn’t want to respond in haste. But I’m ready to take a crack at it now.
I am, of course, grateful for the comments defending my work. And I think “Girl Next Door” sums up a lot of my own feelings—and hopes for how Last Kiss is perceived.
But doing Last Kiss is a bit of a tightrope walk because much of the time I’m satirizing sexual, romantic and relationship tropes. I try to make things as outlandish as I can. Mostly because I’m trying to be funny, but sometimes because I’m trying to make a point.
(And I’m always surprised—and a little alarmed—when readers tell me that I’ve reproduced something that’s actually happened to them!)
However, if I misstep there’s always the danger that readers will think I’m actually endorsing those behaviors.
Frankly, much of the time my characters act like idiots. Or—even worse—hypocrites. But that’s not surprising. I think love and lust can do that to even the best of us.
“Guy,” let me be clear, women have every right to be as sexually active as men. And every right to be dissatisfied when their needs (sexual and otherwise) aren’t met or taken seriously.
Of necessity women show up in Last Kiss more often than men. That’s because the vast majority of my art is taken from romance comics where women dominate most panels. But when men do show up in Last Kiss they are every bit—if not more—-likely to be shown as misguided dolts.
Ultimately, I hope I achieve some sort of balance; a measure of insight; and lot of laughs for my readers.
Don’t stop or change. You are doing a great job.
Thanks, Peter!