6 Comments

1. 

   FIne jams and jellies since 1982 on January 30, 2020 at 8:41 pm

   “It will give me ideas for the book jacket and sales pitch. It will probably also give me syphilis. But whether that’s from the toilet seat or sleeping with you, we’ll just have to wait and see.”
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   And the winner for weakest excuse to get yourself invited to a guy’s room is…
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   “It will give me ideas for the book jacket and sales pitch! Provided your book is about physical pleasure in it’s most degrading and filthiest of forms.”
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   “You do know I’m not really a writer, right?”
   “That’s okay. I’m not really a woman.”
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   “Now if you’ll excuse me, these curtains aren’t going to turn into oversized clown pants on their own.”
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   We laughed and joked and made a date! The joke being that he thought I was going to put out…
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   We laughed and joked and made a date! Then we got morose and sad and made a fig…
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   Reply
   • 

     Rex on January 31, 2020 at 5:18 am

     Back in the 90’s, a buddy of mine swore this worked in Mallorca: “Wanna see the wallpaper in my room?”

     Back then, that story was at least plausible.

     Reply
     • 

       fine jams and jellies since 1982 on February 2, 2020 at 7:26 pm

       I had a friend whose pick up line went:

       “You like apples?”

       Then regardless of how she answered:

       “You want to screw?”

       He said it worked more often than I would think it would. I told him it only had to work once then. He said, yeah but boy was it a good one. So what do I know?

       Reply
       • 

         PKM on February 3, 2020 at 8:36 pm

         True story, I actually tried this once. At this bar I used to hang out at, I told a pretty girl “I’m an archaeologist, let me dig in your bush!” I’ll be damned, but I did get a date out of it.

         The funniest part about all of it is I was an actual archaeologist at the time. She about pissed herself laughing when I later told her my profession.

         Reply
2. 

   interventor on January 31, 2020 at 4:41 am

   So, you wish to be a trophy. Great, next addition to my game room. I’m a big game hunter, BTW.

   Reply
3. 

   Dave Dell on January 31, 2020 at 5:23 am

   Put some ears on her and we find the doppelgänger:

   https://imgur.com/gallery/BPD78

   Reply