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1. 

   Fine jams and jellies since 1982 on April 2, 2019 at 11:00 pm

   …If only they realized it was the guy at the counter who had farted.
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   …which was fine, because they liked their meals like they liked their sex: quiet, uncomfortable, and in a room filled with strangers who were all too busy eating doughnuts to notice what was going on.
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   But there seemed to be only awkward silence between them…well. That and the body of a dead cheerleader.
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   …which was when one of the producers of ‘The Batchelor’ turned to the other and said, “Wow. This might be our most exciting episode ever!”
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   But there only seemed to be only awkward silence between them…All because somebody replaced the usual fine coffee served in this cafe with Folgers Instant Coffee.
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   …And so, another meeting of the Garfield Without Garfield Fan Club came to an end.

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