2 Comments

1. 

   Fine jams and jellies since 1982 on August 26, 2018 at 8:13 pm

   “And be ‘we’ I mean you. My life is going swimmingly!”
   _________________________

   “I didn’t plan on being a bodiless head floating through an all-white void. But here I am…”
   _________________________

   “I didn’t plan on being married, divorced, married again, widowed, and married a third time while serving twenty years in a women’s prison.But love finds you no matter how many others are in the shower with you.”
   _____________________________

   “…and when that happens, we settle. Like I did for you dear.”
   _____________________________

   “Well…Anyway, thanks for the Mother’s Day card. Mommy doesn’t regret you at all sweetie. Really.”
   _____________________________

   “Now drag that boy scout’s body into the hole we dug. There’s only two hours til daylight and I want to be across the state line by then.”
   _____________________________

   “Which isn’t always a bad thing. I was engaged to Bruce Jenner at one point.”

   Reply
2. 

   Søren Hedemand on August 27, 2018 at 2:36 pm

   …which is why God invented rubber underwear.

   Reply