Last Kiss dialogue and health advice by Dr. Tony Isabella—Ohio’s top heartburn specialist!
Art by Vince Colletta Studio from the story “For Better, Not Worse” in First Kiss #29, Dec. 1962. (Although the comic was published in color, this was scanned from the publisher’s black & white production stats.)
Transcript:
SCENE: A man and a woman embrace. The man is kissing the woman’s check (or maybe nibbling on her ear or neck.) In the background we see a orangish glow.
MAN: Mi amor, my heart burns for you!
WOMAN: Two things…One…you’re probably feeling…the fast-approaching wildfires! Two…evacuate now, amor later.
1962 Art: Vince Colletta Studio Color: Diego Jourdan Pereira
Writer: Tony Isabella
DJP.lk365
FK29.4.1.1
“How do you do Mr. Horlick? Or more importantly, who do you do?”
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And I had made my mind up then, before I was introduced.
“How do you do Mr. Horlick. Horlick. Is that a German name?”
“Yes. It means He Who Slobbers on Prostitutes. And you are?”
“Molly Dongspittle.”
Somehow…it was like we were meant to be together!
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“They’re such simple words! Why can’t I say them to him?..
…Ronnie…do you know what genital warts are?”
…Ronnie…we’re standing in dog poo.”
…Ronnie…who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong?”
…Ronnie…if Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear and Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, then Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn’t fuzzy, was he?”
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She wanted him For Better, Not Worse! And damn sure Richer Not Poorer!
Great writing, Jams. I’m laughing so hard. Molly’s a perfect match.
He Who Slobbers on Prostitutes would be a great—-if odd—-name for a porn comic. (Great work as always, jams!)
…or a heavy metal band
Looking at the gocomics page my first reaction was ‘Why does he have big flowers sown on his sleeves?” My second reaction was that a guy with flowers sown on his sleeves is the guy who likes that style of makeup.
Sown or sewn? If the first, his shirt needs a wash. If the second, well, it fits with the style.
My theory is that he’s been attacked by a giant hogweed bush. No, not *her* bush! 8^D
Hey, *I* like that style of makeup. It makes me think of all the exotic women in the world. Women who are mysterious and bold. Women who are spies and daring, thrill-speaking adventurers. In other words, women I’ve never dated! Comic book women!!!
His arm is being overtaken by a flowering bush!!
No, it’s not hers! 8^P
Thank God her flowering bush isn’t being blamed. Otherwise her flowering bush would have to get a lawyer. Do you know how much a flowering bushy lawyer costs?!!
Even a flowering bush-league lawyer costs a fortune!
Is it just me, or am I seeing at least a hint of Dick Giordano in the original art?
You could be right. When I asked Dick to identify credits for First Kiss, he just listed this story as being by the Vince Colletta Studio (and to me there’s definitely involvement by Colletta here.) But the story was done so long ago! Dick could’ve had a hand in it and simply forgot.
There’s a big forest fire out there!! What, nothing about space lasers?
Not this time. But we’ll be doing a special Last Kiss that reveals the truth about space lasers and who is really using them to start forest fires.
(Hint: I’m not saying it’s you. But we’ve got photos of you. And you’re near a tree. Very suspicious.)
Well, ya gotta go somewhere!
Bah! MY space lasers are used for much more interesting things that piddly forest fires!!