This is loosely based on something said (in a very public forum) by a real person. In fact, at the time, she was a comic book editor. I’ve never been sure if she was serious.
But she and her husband broke up shortly after that. So you have to wonder…
↓ Transcript
WOMAN (talking to man): Sure I can multi task! I do it all the time during sex!
Ah yes… there’s nothing quite like Group Sex!
“Joan, place your knee on Joe’s right buttock while whispering the Preamble of the Constitution in Anne’s ear. Anne, lick Arnie’s heel while pouring the melted chocolate over TIna’s elbow. Tina, sing ‘La Dolce Vita’ in Finnish while shaving Gerhard’s long-hair dachshund. Gerhard, tickle Joan’s other knee. I’ll be over here, filming the whole thing for NudeTube, and tossing the random water balloon filled with condiments. Pretend I’m not here.”
Or were you thinking along the lines of “lie back and think of the Queen”?
(This only works with British lasses. Sometimes I like to recite Shakespeare’s St. Crispin’s Day speech… “O that we now had here / But one ten thousand of those men in England / That do no work to-day!” …during the act.)
Does thinking of baseball stats to prolong the inevitable count?
What about thinking of that hot number I saw on the bus while shtumpfing my girlfriend?
What about when I think of my next “appointment”? (Dolores likes tulips, and I need to make a reservation at Le Circque for my date with Babette, and I need to pick up the Kangaroo costume from the dry cleaners before I meet Dardanelle…)
In that case, I think you want to use the term “ambisextrous”.
Actually, Torsten, I deliberately left it vague as to which sort of multi tasking she had in mind. (Supply your own dirty details. And you did!)
By the way, I love your examples–particularly the first one. As always, I’m amazed by your inventively detailed suggestions!
he he, thanks. I am waiting on your next post.